There has never been a human being in existence or indeed the history of existence who has ever had a worse cold than the one I am suffering (so quietly) with right now. Far be it for me to moan of course but I should be being tended too by a fleet of top international nurses and doctors…such is the extent of my discomfort and torment. Instead I am forced against my will to mix my own Lemsip…
Why is the Pope not at my door asking me to repent my sins? Does he know that I haven’t got long enough to remember them all? Or does he know that when he asks me to renounce the devil I’d have to tell him that I’d made enough enemies already…
I am barely fit enough to lift my quill and pen these words to you my dear friends and certainly can’t concentrate long enough to post my usual warbles on flower growing. Please bare with me…perhaps the good Lord Santa Jesus will let me live through this night and tomorrow I shall once again be allowed to wibble away, uninterupted by this savage aliment.
PS No this is definitely not run of the mill Man Flu…
January 22, 2011 @ 11:29 am
Oh dear, poor you Ben! If I can dare to be positive, whilst you are under the influence of all those hot toddies; better to get a dose of something now whilst the ground is too cold and hard to grow flowers than later on in Spring. Wrap up, keep warm and nurture yourself (in the absence of the attentive staff) and hopefully you will soon be up to lifting that pen again. ;)
January 22, 2011 @ 11:40 am
Bless you Martine! The nasty lurgy is disappearing fast…I expect to be match fit by tomorrow. The ground can wait!
January 20, 2011 @ 9:33 pm
You need a hat and a bottle of whisky. Put the hat on the bedpost and drink the whisky until you can see 4 hats. Watering it down with honey and lemon will make it more palatable(if , like me, you don’t like whisky). Alternatively, if you can still get Night nurse, one dose has the same effect!
My daughter in law got flu last week-she was 39 weeks pregnant at the time and had to be admitted to hospital-it was total lock down, no visitors, masks and hand gel, segregation ward, the works. Luckily it wasn’t swine flu and she delivered a beautiful baby grandaughter this morning after an emergency C section. Count yourself lucky!
January 20, 2011 @ 9:41 pm
yeah whew!!! No babies for me this time!!!!
Congratulations to Mother and baby…glad to hear all is well at Jan towers… x ;)
January 20, 2011 @ 8:46 am
My dad’s remedy was to drink Whiskey until you can’t see your feet – he well knew the flaw of laying on the sofa whilst administering it ;)
January 20, 2011 @ 5:08 pm
…I’ve had a few and now I can see four feet…I’ve got a long way to go obviously…hic…hic…
January 19, 2011 @ 11:20 pm
Aw, are you being a brave little soldier? Banana custard, comic and a balloon should do it – cures all known ills (even man flu). Jx
January 20, 2011 @ 5:43 am
Banana custard truly is the food of the Gods…I might nip out now to the all night supermarket just to finagle some nanas… that may just give me enough energy to carry on…oh woe is me… x
January 19, 2011 @ 10:19 pm
I think you may be right Doctor Norrington…I shall medicate forthwith…
January 19, 2011 @ 10:15 pm
Bless. Hot toddies are the only comfort.